Sunday, August 6, 2017

The longest weekend

I am hollow.

I can barely hold my head up this weekend. I can't think.  My brain is a sieve.  Thoughts fall apart and fall through.

Maybe it's because Greg's garage and workshop are being dismantled this weekend- his things separated into piles for disposal.  I know it has to happen, but I hate the thought of it.


Scott stopped on his way home from Amy's.  It wasn't a long visit - but it was a good one.  It's helpful to me when he and Richard are honest - when they tell me how they feel - how their day went - what thoughts they have about... everything.  Again, he amazes me.

After Scott leaves, it all hits me again - and again, I fall apart.  For the second time, I am sure they are going to take me away in a straight jacket - or worse.

I don't want pity - I don't want to be a weight.  I hate people staring at me when I cry.  Michael tries to help, but no one can help.  I hate being a spectacle.

I run to the bathroom, sobbing, shaking, barely able to see - and lock the door behind me.  I sob violently and pound the walls with my fists.  Time has no meaning.  15 minutes?  Half an hour?  45 minutes?  An hour?  I have no idea.

Eventually, I'm able to leave the bathroom, still crying, grab my phone and call Richard.  He lives the closest.  Maybe he will come - but he doesn't answer.  I know he's at the pool with his family - no phone.  I'm partially relieved.  If he knew I needed him, he'd come.  But what could he do if he were here?

Michael stays close - brings me some water. I'm shaking too hard too drink it.   He talks to me and offers me water again.  This time I'm able to take a sip. My heart is pounding - I can feel the arrhythmia - but I think the crisis is over.

Richard calls and I'm determined to hold myself together, but it doesn't go well.  He asks me questions to find how to help me, but I have a hard time stringing two thoughts together.  I'm scattered - disjointed - frustrated - desperate to explain what I can't.  I can't think - can't make a decision about anything. I feel like an infliction. He offers to come to my house, but I know I'm going to be gone again and I don't want him to see it - or hear it. 

As soon as I hang up, the tears flow again.  I hate this.  I hate the pain. I hate the tears.  I hate the sounds I make.  I hate - myself.

My sweet son is dead.  How can I possibly communicate to anyone how this feels.



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